Excuse me Boss!!!

 

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Well, let me assure you this has nothing to do with my boss. Well to tell you the truth my team in FindNearYou.com is probably the coolest team. We get to meet celebrities and do a lot of cool stuff and the best part is FindNearYou.com is one big happy family kinds. Lots of fun. But as I said this is not about work so…

I was invited by Alexandra for a beach get-together one Friday evening. (This was happening in the same beach where they have a memorial upon which people piss all the time. Infact one friend of a friend of a friend even found a couple making out. If someone would come too close their secret code was tch…tch…) So Alexandra her boyfriend Arnaud, Laury and me got some sandwiches and then went in search of the picnikers. We found them sitting right at the beach front drinking beer.(Is that not illegal?) Anyways there were men and women, young and old, chatty and quiet, students and office goers and the best, French and German. They were in separate groups and I could catch some words in French. Though the German skidded away to glory over my bald head. I realized I have a prejudice that the German and French are like sworn enemies. (Well if you are wondering why, you really need to bruch your history!!!) But they were nothing of that sort, though they sat in separate circles they were all mingling and jingling.

After a while people started getting up and I was like “Finally picnic over”. But while that thought was running I realized these people were walking towards the sea. They were going for a swim. They were changing right over there with the local boys who were watching all this passing nasty comments.

But before too many people realized what was happening they were having a ball in the dirty salty water. There were some who had stayed back, like my friends Arnaud, Alexandra, Laury and Camille. Slowly a crowd was gathering around us and I was like ” These guys have gone crazy” But a group of guys walked up to me and started talking to me.

Boy1 : Excuse me Boss!! Hello Boss!!!

Boy 2 : Are you from foreign?

I was really in no mood to talk.

Boy 1 Excuse me Boss. Are you working or Studying?

Boy 3 : Dai Avarukku English Theriyadhunnu Ninnaikiren( I think he does not understand english)

Boy 1 : Excuse me Boss. Just talk something.Let us have friendship.

I was wondering “Is he Gay and hitting on me?” I just ignored him and after a while they left having realized no one was talking with them.

I keep wondering why he kept saying “Excuse me Boss” he should have called me MOTTAI BOSS!!!!. Bleddy Fella!!!

For an Audio Version excusemeboss

The 71

Yeah This is my 71st post and I like this number for a number of reasons none of which will be told to you people simply because I don’t wish to bore you with the inane things. but yes I have a cool video for you people. I created it with a tool called Animoto.

Also I had been to this nice event about Tea Tasting @ The Alliance and I wrote an article for FindNearYou.com (If you did not know, this is where I have fun during the day) Click Here to Read the Article and leaving a comment here and there would be appreciated.

WeP Printer Manual Story

I was once told that the best DMP printer that I could lay my hands on was a WeP LX 800DX printer. As usual I never bothered to verify their claims and just got it. For people who have never had to know what a DMP is, it is a Dot Matrix Printer. Yes the one which goes keeech… keeech, kich…keech…keech, keech and takes about 2 minutes to print a single fanfold page.

Careless fellow I am I lost the printer manual. So I emailed the folks at WeP asking them for a manual.

from Aravind Kumar <kumarbac@gmail.com> to wep.dmp@wepindia.com date Wed, Mar 5, 2008 at 12:45 PM subject Need Printer Manual…. mailed-by gmail.com

Hey,

I own a WeP LX 800DX Dot Matrix Printer. I have lost the user manual for this printer.Would you kindly Send me a Copy either as an attachment or as a link from where I can download it from.

Regards,
Aravind Kumar B.

I got this reply

Ramdinsanga Saiawi - Corporate - Product - Marketing <Ramdin.S@wepindia.com> to Aravind Kumar <kumarbac@gmail.com> date Mon, Sep 15, 2008 at 12:13 PM subject RE: Need Printer Manual….

These guys are Freakingly Funny. Why would they remind me of a piece of shitty printer whose manual I don’t have.. I am just an average Indian Customer you Corporate Honchos. You can SHAFT me all you want and I will usually take it lying down.

P.S. : I got pissed off because these guys are still asking me for my postal address and contact number so they can send the printer manual to some of my descendants. Hold on to it guys who knows it maybe a collectors item then…

Girls and Women are complicated…

You could also call this Part 2 of Girls Colleges are dumb. Well you can call this what you want I really would be happy if you came up with an alternate title for this post.

I was surfing You Tube this morning and I normally look for Stand up Comedy shows. So I was watching this clip of Carlos Menci…

Funny guy, he says what he says with a lot of courage and gets people to laugh. But I don’t know if he has feminists wanting to murder him. I would love to see if I can get away with this.

Anyways basically girls/women are complicated. Read Narain’s experience with a 7 year old called Yasmin. Poor fellow freaked out with the things she said. I really doubt if a boy would have said the things Yasmin said.

Just like Carlos says women have too many things on their mind. Sometimes it is very nice. But most times it gets on my nerves to know that they are thinking of something/someone else when they are talking to me.

So coming back to the college culturals… Did I mention that I was not allowed to go out for lunch and worse still was they did not have a Restroom for guys.( Restroom is such a stupid word, whoever coined that must have slept while taking a poop or maybe while standing at the urinal to take a leak) I was offered by a girl that she would stand guard while I took a nice grand leak in the ladies room. (Ofcourse I refused.) What’s worse I was complaining to a few lady professors about how we were not being allowed to go out for lunch or any break for the matter of fact and this lady professor looks at me and says “Oh, they probably think that you are a college student” I was like “What, are you kidding? this must be some kind of joke” The professor just left with a grin whose meaning I am still deciphering.

All said and done, My friend Amirtha was not let into the college. Fishing Embarassing. But Narain who also happens to be her friend somehow managed to get her in. The question I had and still have is “Why won’t they let a girl into a girls college?” Men please dont attempt answers to these questions because we are not meant to answer them. Women please do leave your answers.Men please ask more questions.

Cheers!!! People. I have so many Girls College Stories. Someone of them give me nightmares. (Just kidding about the nightmares.)

Girls Colleges are Dumb…

Recently I had to spend two days in a girls college. I had some great experiences, mostly some not so great experiences. My interaction with girls got intense only in the year 2000 and I have since then made up for the Lost Years. Before the Year 2000 I studied in an All Boys College and before that in an All Boys School. So all I knew was to make fun of girls when they were not around and behave like a true gentleman when they were around.(Yeah I know, Kind of skewed way to grow up)

So two days in a girls college was 2 days of torture. I am happy I am a man. I can now appreciate what a girl goes through in this society better.

1. Not Everything in Life is Fun

2. Every Cloud has a silver Lining

3. Hot Girls are mostly Dumb (Well it is a MCP remark, but you don’t know what I went through. So take a break and don’t judge me)

4. Even a girl can’t enter a girls college.

5. Rotting inside a girls College and Not able to take a Leak is extremely painful.

6. It is not fun to be surrounded by 100’s of girls on a hot day.

7. Know what I am getting into at least in the future.

8. Amazing what 2 days has taught me.

So 2 days and I can see myself getting married to someone, anyone, whoever it will be. But please let it not be some girl who studied in an All girls college. Girls with too much of Estrogen are as bad as us testosterone driven males. Oh my God the way girls yelled and sang Shor macha le, Shor Macha Le….(Parody to the Dhoom title music) and gave those sly smile to boys from other colleges(the smile for which many a boy leaves jollu(saliva)) And as I saw these famous mating rituals from the sidelines, I wondered when the mating itself would take place. But tough luck, Cops were brought in and some boys were taken to their Mother-in-law’s house by the Father-in-law and some of their brother-in-laws. Hope they were not treated too well.

My friend Sathyanarain was stopped by the girls when he was trying to take a general picture of the crowd. Reason being he looks like a Youth. But he protested and tried hard to reason out but sadly no luck. He was sent out and he had to spend the rest of the day taking photos of Crows.

Ofcourse there were some really wonderful moments which I have chosen not to talk about so that I can be a wonderful pessimist. Yes I have a PART 2 to this coming up next.

P.S. : Thanks, Narain(Click here to read his lingerie shopping experience), Nandy and Amirtha for making life bearable for me. Of Course Jasmine(or was it Yasmin) was sweet enough to show Sathya that he should not talk too much. Thanks Narain for the Crow Photos. And Ofcourse Bill Watterson for the Calvin and Hobbes Strip.